So...today was kinda a blah friday. The weather was mediocre...but if it had been a scoche warmer it would have been good. So...today i'm struggling with some inner conflicts...and i'm likely to explode on the first person to push the wrong button. So...tread lightly. So...once again the male gender has baffled me. Just when i think i have them all figured out...they do something to totally lose me again. Why can't men just...say what they mean...and mean what they say...I think i've discovered what my problem is though right now...and why i feel on the verge of bursting about 80% of the time. I have all this passion...and no one to use it on. I have all these witty jokes...but no one to tell them to. I have a lot of love...and no one to give it to. So i have all these feelings...and no release for them. I gotta figure out how to be passionate...witty...and love...that doesn't involve other people...i guess this is the final transition to living alone. Sometimes it really sucks. Maybe i need a roommate or something. Anyone wanna move to fort wayne? So...i've decided i really hate self-censorship...and sometimes when someone makes a wrong decision...or maybe a decision for the wrong reason...i just want to shake them and say look in front of you for god sake and quit your bitchin'...of course...i'm sure several people have thought that about me on more than one occasion. I mean...for shit's sake...it took me a really long time to get all my shit together...i think maybe too long. Well...when people go from high school to college they reinvent themselves. I suppose you can do it between college and real life too. So...here's to a long arduous process of unwanted change. I'm sure tomorrow i'll be a little more positive...it's just been a tough...emotional week. Thanks for putting me in my place...sometimes i forget...but this will be the last time.